A typical ,12th standard girl's day starts at 5:30 in the morning.A glass of milk/coffee,and a physics /maths assignment to finish.Hurriedly she takes a bath ,and rushes, not minding the breakfast .Waiting in the bus-stop cudn't be worse; with the study-material in hand, she, trying to memorise the Latin names of the organic compounds,for the chemistry class.Lectures are really interesting,when she is prepared for them.Else, it isn't any better than netherworld!! At the end of the day,results for the weekend test,are displayed on the notice board,she is fizzeled out that she is n't the top dog. She decides to spend yet more time on her studies, even if,it is at
the cost of missing her favorite cartoon show on TV ! Tired and restless , she reaches home , with just one thought..... She has to top ,the following test!!
Two years downstream,this girl lands up in some not-so-bad Engineering/Degree college,with a group of very similar nerdy oafs.Still, trying to top the class,still ready to spend sleepless ,nervous,jumpy nights,with books!
Only if...only if she could prove that ,...She, is the Best!!
When i heard these two words,for the first time from a friend, my reaction was, but obvious.
How selfish, to even ask that!!I could think of a hundred reasons... My brother always topped his class, my Mom would be happy,if i did well in my sybjects............many more!!
But after a li'l thought ,i felt it is the only valid question,that a person needs to to ask himself; and find an answer better than ...." for parents....." or "for teachers...";to 'Succeed' in life.
Now,how one defines success, matters a lot for the understanding of this question.
A student manages to get into a reasonalby good college for his under-graduation, and then into a reasonably good ,well-paid job.But , who can get him back,those hundreds of sleepless nights that he spent,so, that he makes his future 'secure'. And after all the effort, he can never be any sure,of the outcomes. And again the 'reasonably'-good makes a difference. It isn't the best.When he looks back, to the days he spent in just trying to prove himself to be the best , he might feel good for the effort.But then he ll ,sure as anything, feel bad about not being able to join basketball coaching , as a friend of his had done! For whom??
He ll only feel bad!
Every child from a very tender age,is taught in schools, that they need to be the best. Being first in the class, studies-wise ,makes a student ,good ,or otherwise.He needs to study social-studies,whether he likes it or not.Thus, getting used to being influenced by the crowd around ,from childhood.In fact he is being 'taught' to get influenced by his environment!
Who knows,he might grow up and evolve into a Ram gopal verma, or a Sachin tendulkar.But ,he ll not, because Ram Gopal Verma needs to study physics.And sachin Tendulkar is busy memorising Robert Frost's poetry!Or,worse... Shakespeare has a Mathematics test tomorrow.
And then, why does one even need to excel ,by force, in any field.If he is good enuff , its positive. And if he has fun doing something ,there s nothing that could be better!!Why compete ??
In this urgency and keenness, to be the Ace,one always forgets what he wants in life.What he wants to be.What he really is! Being one's true self is something ,our system can never teach its products.Not everyone can be number one. Every person is significant in himself, even if he isn't an achiever. And then,it doesn't really matter.Why should there be a comparision at all,when life ,and experience is diverse for each one of us.Each person receives lessons ,in his own way, the outlook he develops towards things, is always unique, depending only on what his life has taught him.
I, live for myself, and only for myself.Whats the fun doing things ,that i am not comfortable doing!?Whats the need for us ,to see the future, that isn't certain. Whats the need to be, what someone else is,only because,people think they re cool!
We urgently need to learn, to appreciate ,that others can be better than, what we are. It does make a difference.That doesn't make us bad!! It only betters us.It makes us better persons.Competetion,in itself,is one hurdle we need to get over.To whom do we hav to prove,that we are the best?? We can never change what we are. We ll remain ,this way ,for ever.Then, whats the whole heck of getting into competetion ,losing yourself into it , trying to get over, and failing to be happy!!
Losing the best days of our lives, trying to compare ourselves with others. Losing the lovely school days , trying to get better scores, and failing to be happy.
Failing to be happy!
Here it comes, my definiton for Success.
Being happy ,with the person ,i have made out of myself ,at any point in life,is what success means to me.If i get to know ,that i am dying tomorrow,and i am not sad about it,I think i am ,successful. I dont have ungranted wishes , unachieved goals , or unattended desires! Taking life as it came.Not regretting my actions.Not complaining!!I have lead my life , through these eighteen years, and i feel, i ve done justice to myself.I don't care how good i ve been in the race. Life isn't the race alone. Life has taught me a lot more than,just trying to excel. It has taught me to be myself. It has taught me to be happy, being myself. To be successful, where most others fail!!